HOW TO START OVER AND START LIVING…NOW
By: Velinda Peyton
If you’re in a rut, unhappy with your life or just aren’t where you want to be, here are some things that will help you move forward.
IGNORE THE FEAR AND UNCERTAINTY
I meet people frequently who are wanting to change their lives, however, they put little to no effort into doing so. Some people are so afraid of change that they will acquiesce to living their whole lives being miserable. I would rather experience temporary lack than live unfulfilled, unhappy and in mindless routine. Ignore the fear of uncertainty because everything in life is uncertain.
Yes, when people change their lives there is usually a period of feeling lost or not knowing where to start. Not so infrequently there is also a period of less and struggle. But these things are what propel us forward into the life we really desire to live. Uncertainty is motivating and the actions we take to overcome the struggle are exactly what we need to do to have the life we want.
Fear is such a debilitating state of mind. It keeps us living in lack, unhappiness, trepidation, isolation and dreaming about what will never happen because the fear is more important and dominant than living our desires. Like not worrying about what others think, you have to get rid of fear by facing it or you will be stagnant your entire life. Usually what we fear is exaggerated and never happens anyway.
CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE, THOUGHTS AND BELIEFS
I know, I know, we hear about attitude all the time, but there’s a reason for it. Attitude and thoughts determine our life. Changing any negative thoughts you have to positive ones…whether at first you believe what you are telling yourself or not, changes everything from how you feel to what you do. So, don’t ignore the power here of attitude, thoughts and beliefs because they can make it or break it for you. Your attitude, thoughts and beliefs are one of the most powerful and important factors in determining your life.
I did this when I was younger simply because I was consumed by negativity and cynicism from childhood. I hated the way I felt, so one day I simply decided to start thinking positively. At first, I didn’t believe a thing I was saying to myself, but I kept thinking positive…opposite thoughts anyway. After about two months I noticed that I was happier and felt hopeful about my future. I felt lighter because all the negative thoughts were not weighing me down. And then I moved on from there to realizing I could control my life with my thoughts and attitude. I know this will work for you, so just try it.
MAKE YOUR OWN RULES AND GO AFTER WHAT YOU REALLY WANT
You don’t have to live up to what society’s rules are. Go your own way, do your own thing, be different. You are different and your life is not like anyone else’s. So many people get caught up in a routine life of responsibility and what is expected. Yes, we have to pay taxes and stop at red lights or we complicate our lives. But live a little and quit thinking there is some kind of list you have to follow while your dreams and desires are passing you by. Be innovative and never think that you can’t be or have or do what you want. Here is where attitude, thoughts and beliefs play a really important part in our lives.
WORK ON YOURSELF
What stops us in life is our own feelings of doubt and insecurity. How many times do people feel they can’t do something because they feel they can’t measure up to an expert in the field? Or maybe you don’t have the education, or experience. Or perhaps you don’t know how to start or that you don’t have the resources. All of these things are BS, because if you really want to live a happy life, you have to get rid of what holds you back. Like changing your attitude and thoughts, you have to get rid of what is holding you back from having the life you want
For one month change your thoughts about the above issues. Challenge your insecurities and realize that they are not who you are but only what you are thinking. People have come from poverty, a lack of education, a lack of experience, and even personal handicaps to achieve what they really put their mind to. Really work on this…not just once or twice and then give up, but persistently. After one month, see and feel the difference in your life.
WHO CARES WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK OR SAY ABOUT YOU?
Get rid of this now if it plagues you. When you stop worrying about what other people think, your free from that debilitating mindset. Other people aren’t living your life or your dreams and their thoughts about you aren’t important. There is always going to be someone who doesn’t want to see you succeed or is there to bring you down if you do succeed. That’s just the nature of some people…so ignore it. If you know you have something you are burning to do that is different from what everyone else is doing, no matter what others may think, do it anyway. And don’t compare your life or yourself to anyone else because you are unique for a reason.
YOU’VE GOT TO TAKE ACTION
You can do everything above to improve yourself, but without action, it’s just a dream. Nothing happens in life without action. If your first steps meet with failure, understand that failure is simply sending you in the right direction so you don’t spend time in the wrong direction. In other words, keep trying. Just about every person who has been successful in going after their dreams has met with failure at some point. Learn from it and keep going. It’s the only way people succeed.
After you’ve tried these above suggestions for one month, let me know how your life has changed. If it hasn’t changed in a positive way, then you’re not trying or not trying hard enough. These will work!